Show and Tell

Today is Friday and that means only one thing to Ryley. It is his designated Show and Tell day at Kindergarten.

He takes it very seriously, weighing the benefits and drawbacks of the things he wants to show to his class. He thinks about it all week. Our problem is that it is only November and we are rapidly running out of knick-knacks and souvenirs for him to take to school.

So far he has taken a picture of himself from piano camp, his Timex alarm clock, his Thomas the Tank Engine monthly calendar, a metal airplane piloted by Snoopy, his stuffed Bugs Bunny, his miniature Bugs Bunny, a car being driven by Cookie Monster wearing a helmet, and a few other odds and ends. This morning was a particular struggle to find something Show and Tell worthy. While looking around the house, I thought of a few objects he could take. But what would he say about them?

Mommy’s Old Slippers These are my mommy’s slippers, which she wears all the time. This stain is from spaghetti. I don’t know why she was wearing her slippers at dinnertime. This one is from when the dog threw up and she stepped in it. Oh, and this purple line is from when I colored on it with my sister’s markers. Can I go now Mrs. Smith? My mom is waiting outside to get them back…

Bottle of Worcestishire Sauce This brown bottle is from our refrigerator. It has been in there since before I can even remember–I think it is about 8 years old. It was stuck to the inside of the refrigerator–I think daddy’s pickled beets leaked again. Once, my brother tasted it. He said it was very yucky and he was going to die. But he didn’t.

Iron Wow, this is heavy! I found this in the laundry room. It was on a shelf behind a bunch of boxes. My mom gets it out when she needs to put pictures on our t-shirts for Vacation Bible School—I think I heard her call the pictures “iron-ons”. That happens in the summer, just one time a year. Then she puts it back for another year. I can’t wait til summer!

Bag full of remotes My daddy collects TV remotes. He says some are “universal”, some are only for the DVD, some are only for the VCR, some are for the tuner, some are for the TV, and some of them do everything. Some have lights, some don’t. Some have batteries. One of them is for the air conditioner. TV remotes are for when you want to play like you have a cell phone, like your mommy.

Mommy’s Senior Picture This was my mommy a long long time ago, in the 80’s. That is when all the girls sprayed their hair with stuff that made it very stiff and hard, like a cactus. And they made their hair very tall, too! Almost up to the sky! They liked to wear really big sweaters. Maybe it was very cold in the 80’s. That black stuff around her eyes is called “eye-liner”. It looks like she was playing with a marker, kind of like me when I colored my belly button green one day. That was funny!

Confronted with these options, I sent Ryley to school with a remote control car. I am already thinking about next week. Maybe Ryley could take the Universe that is contained in Lee’s sourdough starter jar? Maybe not.