Redux

Originally posted on December 21st, 2004 but utterly relevent:

Christmas Shopping Haiku

Want the “free” gift wrap?
It only costs six dollars
Looks like an eyesore.

Santa is scary
Beard like albino ferret,
Food court taco breath.

Parking lot stalker
Do you think my space is close?
I assure you, it’s not.

Parking lot stalker
You idle hopelessly long–
Six* kids to strap in.

The busy bathroom,
Dancing and anxious they wait
Regretting eggnog.

Food court carousel
Spins festively fast around,
Unwise location.

Carousel rider
You appear rather greenish!
Next time eat after ride.

I am next in line
So why do you crowd in front?
You must be special.

My ears just fell off,
Too weary from “Silver Bells”
Played ten dozen times.

Bags full of presents
They will say “I love it!” but
Re-gift it next year.

*the original haiku stated “five” kids