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For two years, I was proud to be a contributor at A Deeper Story. I wrote alongside many amazing authors, writers, and poets, often wondering how on earth I got so lucky. I often felt unworthy. They were the Alice Coopers to my Wayne.
Nish Wiseth, the founder and chief editor, has decided the time has come to move on, so she is closing up shop. I’ve decided to re-post my work from there here. Every Saturday, a new-to-Lifenut post I wrote for A Deeper Story will appear here (with Nish’s blessing and encouragement). These posts often focus on issues of faith, culture, church, and how they intersect through story. I am very fond of these posts and don’t want them disappearing. Folding them into Lifenut is like folding chocolate chips into cookie dough.
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The Asparagus Birds
(originally published September 20, 2013)
The ditch was nearly a half-mile long. It bordered a farmer’s land to the south and brought irrigation water to his corn. A two-lane country road bordered the north side of the ditch. That was the road my sister and I took to pick wild asparagus. Our plastic baskets with garish plastic daisies carried our organic harvests home, up a steep driveway and into our mother’s newly-revised dinner plans. She was always so gracious when we’d arrive home, sweaty and beaming. Of course, we can eat the asparagus!
Sometimes, she joined our ditchside hunts. That meant our little brother had to come. I wasn’t very happy about having helpers. The more they picked, the less we picked. Every load of asparagus was seasoned with mounds of salty pride. When my mom praised our haul, then prepared it and served it, I was supporting our family in a small way. Me, a provider? Collecting those thin green stalks was my first taste of self-sufficiency. Wild dreams of surviving as a pioneer seemed reachable. Look out, Laura Ingalls: I had a banana-seat bike with a basket, three hundred mosquito bites on my legs, and a song to whistle.
Western Meadowlarks lived along the ditch. They have a very distinctive song. They called to each other as we snapped stalks. At the time, I didn’t know I was paying attention to them until my brother said, “Those are asparagus birds.” We never saw them, but we heard them. I wouldn’t be able to pick out a Western Meadowlark in a police line up. There’s Big Bird. Tweety. Foghorn Leghorn. Some random bird. Sam the Eagle. Woodstock. Sorry, officer, I don’t know who did that to your cruiser.
But if you play a recording of a Western Meadowlark singing, I’ll be 10-years-old with dirt under my nails and a theory; sticks of melted butter makes almost anything more tolerable, especially asparagus. After all that work, fueled by all that pride, I never admitted to anyone that I didn’t like the asparagus we picked. I did it solely out of love. Wouldn’t it be ironic if it turned out they all hated asparagus too? Perhaps they ate it just to please me?
What a vision: Five people eating asparagus they hated because each believed it meant more to the others than themselves.
The Western Meadowlark sings on and on, never changing her call. They nest in the grassy plains of North America and have a wide range; yet they all sound the same. Our asparagus birds lived in the high desert of western Colorado. There are some things that never change or fade, some things that feel eternal and good. The ache of leg muscles as they power a banana-seat bike up a driveway felt eternal and good. I could have brought my mom food forever, but winter came and eventually someone laid pipe in the ditch and covered it with dirt.
No more asparagus. No more pretending to like asparagus. It was time to move on from bike to car, from my parents snoozing in the bedroom across the hall to snoozing on the other side of the state. But if we gathered in the same room again and a Western Meadowlark swooped by and perched on a branch, she’d have to say something. They’re chatty.
We’d look at each other and say, “It’s an asparagus bird.”
Dear You at the End of my Kitchen Table,
You are still fire engine red.
Your leaves are enormous. We are talking lobster bib.
Your hearty, open, thirsty roots snake inside a pot covered in shiny green wrap.
If I woke from a Crusoe-style slumber and walked into my kitchen, I’d guess it was nearing Christmas because of you. A quick glance at any handy calendar would reveal the true date. It is March. Spring is less than three weeks away. We are closer to Memorial Day than Christmas and you will not die.
You will not die.
I am the Lady of the Blackest Thumbs. Houseplants tremble. Gardens weep. They sense my fumbling, over-eagerness to see them thrive. They know I will always water too much, give them too much sunlight, or not enough. I was counting on enjoying you for the two weeks leading up to Christmas and for a week or two after. I never thought we’d wave goodbye to January together. I never thought you’d be around for the Super Bowl or Valentine’s Day.
I never thought you’d still be lush in March because I am me and you are a living plant. Ho ho ho, a jolly voice from the past mocks. It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.
What should I do with you? I can’t bring myself to throw you into one of the big rolling trash cans. Your end can’t come mingling with Ollie’s cast off Easy-Ups. I can’t deprive you of water on purpose. I’ve forgotten other indoor plants but I can’t forget you because there you are, front and center.
I see you blazing every time we eat or cook, you aberration, you uncanny imponderable, you Euphorbia pulcherrima. I was reading about you and learned you can reach heights of 16 feet. That’s just ludicrous. It’s something Dr. Seuss would draw.
In the spirit of Dr. Seuss, I wrote a poem for you.
Euphorbia pulcherrima,
why won’t you die?
Shed those velvety wings,
A ticker-tape goodbye.
It’s up to you, Poinsettia. I’ll keep watering, you keep drinking until the day you wake up and think to yourself that those noises outside must be fireworks celebrating our nation’s independence from red-coated rulers. Red-coated rulers. You are on the wrong side of history, my friend.
Scowling at Your Vibrant Tropical Legendary Beauty Knowing I Should be Grateful and Such,
Gretchen
It’s immortal.
For two years, I was proud to be a contributor at A Deeper Story. I wrote alongside many amazing authors, writers, and poets, often wondering how on earth I got so lucky. I often felt unworthy. They were the Alice Coopers to my Wayne.
Nish Wiseth, the founder and chief editor, has decided the time has come to move on, so she is closing up shop. I’ve decided to re-post my work from there here. Every Saturday, a new-to-Lifenut post I wrote for A Deeper Story will appear here (with Nish’s blessing and encouragement). These posts often focus on issues of faith, culture, church, and how they intersect through story. I am very fond of these posts and don’t want them disappearing. Folding them into Lifenut is like folding chocolate chips into cookie dough.
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An Automatic Flower
(originally published January 18, 2013)
My friend sat across from me at a bookstore coffee shop. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her without a big bag held in the crook of her elbow or slung over her shoulder. She travels with yarn and needles, pulling them out as we sit and laugh and chat. There’s always a project going, either in her head or in her lap.
She has four children. The two oldest girls, sisters adopted as preteens, are grown with babies of their own. They haven’t always made great decisions, but my friend loves them with all her heart even when they have done terribly hurtful, bewildering things. The younger of these girls lives in a mountain town and is isolated in many ways.
There were four of us sitting around the table. We sipped our drinks and talked about the holidays, which were winding down. She pulled a crocheted yarn chain and a needle of her bag. I knew she was going to make a flower. We all admired the flower pins she made in the past, so when she announced we were getting our own, we squealed.
We talked while she worked yarn chains into layered blooms. First pink, then black with a silver strand, then plain black. She began to work with a bright white chain when she got a text.
She read it, sighed, and put her phone away. As her fingers flew, she told us the story behind the text. One of her older daughters was letting her know she got a new phone and could be reached by text. The old phone had been shattered. There was police involvement, hospitalization. It’s truly a sad and complicated situation. Tears fell.
But her fingers kept moving. I watched them press, pinch, pull, twist the chain around and around as her yarn needle dove in and out. Tears fell on the flower as it grew and grew into a full white bloom, glorious. It reminded me of a gardenia, one of the most fragrant and stunning flowers in creation. After attaching a pin, she put it on the table next to the other flowers. We were supposed to choose the flower we wanted.
I didn’t want the white flower. I thought it was the most beautiful, but I couldn’t bring myself to pick it up, to pin it on my coat. It wasn’t that I feared my friend’s tears, but it was most distinctly hers to wear. Her weaving fingers wiped away her daughter’s tears for years. Those fingers, hands, hugging arms couldn’t be there now. I have no idea what my other friends were thinking as they chose, but all left the white flower.
The next time I saw her, she had it pinned to her coat.
I think about the flowers I’ve fashioned and formed as tears fell. I think about how it hurts to pin them on and own them. I think about how they’re worn directly above the heart and I think about how that is no accident.
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