Our microwave broke yesterday. It told us “I’m dying” by emiting lightning and strobing, pulsating light that easily duplicated any 1970’s era roller rink when “Funky Town” was playing. No forks or metal were involved. It just decided to go out in a blaze of glory, unlike our previous microwave that quietly slipped away…
Hubby spent his lunch hour buying a new microwave. He brought it home, hooked it up, and I christened it with a plate of frozen meatballs, which probably disappointed it very much. It wouldn’t say so because it is the most polite microwave. Ever.
When my meatballs were done, the little screen said “Enjoy Your Meal”.
Too bad our appliances have become more civilized than, oh, say, ladies attending a Christian Women’s Conference. Even our DVD player, when turned on, says Welcome to DVD World.
I took Aidan to Payless shoes on Sunday afternoon. They are having the drool-worthy BOGO half-off event. She picked out her shoes and it was my turn to find a pair. As I tried on a pair, Aidan said “those look like water shoes!” and I said “I guess I won’t be getting them!” and laughed. A lady in the same aisle, trying on winter boots, laughed too. She looked at me and said “were you at the Women of Faith conference?”
I was very surprised and said I was, pulling at my Nichole Nordeman (who performed) t-shirt. “How did you like it?” I asked.
“I am never going to another conference with other women again!” she answered.
“Oh…” was all I could manage.
“I went with two other women and they didn’t speak to me the whole time. They sat in back of me. Then there were two young girls in front of me who kept making fun of everyone who walked by…”
“I am sorry…”
Clearly, she was disillusioned. And so was I.
She continued, telling me of how one of the women invited her, but at the last minute the other woman invited herself. It was one of those uncomfortable “three’s a crowd” situations. She was so down, but continued trying on boots. One especially furry pair made her laugh.
She continued telling me about moments that touched her and moments that made her think. One of the speakers, Marilyn Meberg, talked about friendship. The lady in Payless said she realized she didn’t really have true friends like Marilyn Meberg.
I told her I was so sorry, again. I mentioned that I really liked the water shoes, but didn’t want to get them. She asked where I would wear them.
“The grocery store, around the house…” I said.
“You should get them,” she told me.
“I going to!” I answered, glad to have an affirmation that they weren’t the ugliest shoes on the planet.
Friends give each other shoe advice. Even friends for five minutes.
But I didn’t get her name. Where she lives. What she does for a living. I paid and left, saying “it was nice talking to you.”
I am not much of a friend.
I go on and on about how Christians treat each other, and non-believers, horribly. And I am no different.
Our microwave died last year in a really weird way. No forks involved either. When it wasn’t heating something, there would still be a fan or something in it running, and when you’d open the door, it would be hot inside. Good indicator to get a new microwave! Our new one isn’t as polite as yours though. 😉
I understand why you wish your interaction with the Payless Lady could have gone differently. But the important thing is that you recognize it. When I put Peter to bed and we say our prayers, I often pray to God to “forgive us for when we make mistakes and help us to do better tomorrow.” I’m willing to bet that you’ll do better tomorrow (or whenever that next opportunity presents itself).
Women conferences & friendships have been on my mind for a long while. Being the type to want to keep everybody as a friend…forever, I understand your angst about the interaction. BUT, aren’t there different types of friends? Five minute friends might be one of those types. Heck, you even said, “nice talking to you.” I’m sure you made her day.
Ah G, part of being a good friend is being a little easy on yourself. I (over?)analyze almost every social interaction, wondering how I might have been friendlier, more attentive, funnier, less needy, taller, or in your case, more forward about asking for a phone number, but I’m trying to cut myself slack and you should do the same. Let’s break this down. The boot lady probably would have been floored if you’d asked for her number, and not necessarily in a good way. I think everyone enters payless shoes knowing their interactions will be fleeting, with the store, the people and ultimately the shoes. You guys had a nice little exchange, and it brightened your day, and probably hers too.
Hopefully you’ll run into her again
You touched her life for a moment in time. You lent her an ear and shared a laugh with her. I’m willing to bet that she left there feeling a little better then she did when she went in, and for that I’m sure she is grateful to you. Don’t underestimate the power of a five minute friendship.
Awww, *all* of you made me smile. I guess I never thought of a “five minute friendship” as being something that could benefit anybody. But looking back, I see some of the most interesting interactions I’ve had were with people I saw once and never again…at a restaurant or at the zoo—brief conversations that stick with me even years later.
Microwaves scare me. I’ve had dreams that the door was broken and it melted my face as I watched it cook my food. I’d have been mortified witnessing the dramatic death of yours. You’re very brave
…”A woman entered a ‘walk-ins welcome’ Hair Cuttery and sat in the chair for a cut. The stylist noticed the frown on the woman’s face and decided that she needed to be brightened up. He took extra time and gave her the best hair cut and style he could. When he was finished and she looked in the mirror, she smiled for the first time since she entered the salon. She paid for the service and commented that this was the best cut she had ever had and thanked him for doing such a good job. The woman left and the stylist thought he would never see or hear from her again as with most walk-ins but was happy he had brightened her day a little. The next day the stylist came in and a note was left under the door. It read, “Yesterday I came in to get a hair cut and I was going to go back to my hotel and commit suicide, but you gave extra time and care to make me look beautiful and because of that you saved my life. Thank you”. The stylist was shocked and couldn’t believe what an impact he had just by giving someone a little extra time and love”…
It matters our interactions with people even if it’s just in passing. A smile and a little kindness goes a very, very long way.
Like Hamster, I too over-analyze every social interaction I have. I used to think I was borderline having a mental problem for doing this but you know what? Not I am grateful for the awareness. Grateful for being blessed with this sensitivity towards others. It doesn’t mean I don’t make mistakes. I make hundreds. But I am aware, learning, and growing. You are doing great. Don’t be too hard on yourself (but don’t be too easy either : ) You don’t ever want to lose that sensitivity!